Learning a Language Takes Time
Learning a language requires time, attention and, above all, practice. We do not learn a new language in one day. It develops slowly, through different phases and countless small experiences.
People often ask me, “How long did it take you to speak Dutch?” I have never been able to give them a clear answer because my learning journey was not a straight line.
In my previous article, I shared how twenty words and a willingness to connect helped me begin creating a sense of belonging in the Netherlands.
I began full of motivation, studying independently. Later, I followed courses whenever I could, but at the same time I was building a career and working three different jobs. Eventually, I achieved an A2 diploma, but my everyday Dutch remained basic. At work, I used simple sentences, listened to conversations I did not fully understand and tried to piece together their meaning.
Sometimes, without even realising it, I created my own version of what people were saying 🙈
Learning a Language Is an Everyday Process
Learning a language is an everyday process. Try one new word, sentence or question each day, even when you are alone. Repeat it out loud, write it down, use it later in a conversation, or turn it into a short poem or song. Have fun with it, play with the language!
We can also find online teachers and conversation partners who give us a safe place to practise. There are language exchanges, community events and activities designed especially for internationals and some are paid and others are free. Whether online or in person, there are plenty of opportunities to practise. Explore them and discover which ones fit your way of learning.
We learn by interacting with a language regularly. We can create dedicated time to study it actively, while also allowing it to remain present in the background through music, podcasts, television and everyday conversations.
Active and Passive Language Learning
There are two categories of learning, the passive and the active. Passive is when we receive the language, like reading or listening. Active is when we produce the language, like speaking and writing.
Both are necessary, but producing the language often shows what we still need to learn. You may be able to understand a newspaper article or follow a film while still finding it difficult to express your own thoughts in conversation. And that’s quite common, many learners become stuck at this point. They understand more and more but avoid speaking because they are afraid of making mistakes, being misunderstood or having their pronunciation corrected.
But those moments can become valuable learning opportunities. How?
Progress Is Not a Straight Line
What you might experience as a mistake or a failure is often a reflection of what you are capable of achieving. Maybe you’re not there yet, but you’re on your way. Learning a language takes time, just as a baby doesn’t learn to walk in a single day. They fall, they try again, and every attempt is part of the process. They don’t see it as failure, they simply keep learning.
The same is true when learning a language. For example, when you say something to a native speaker and they reply, “Ah, do you mean [skhfaskbfiew]?” they may not be trying to criticise or correct you. Often, they are simply trying to understand what you intended to say. That is your opportunity to ask, “Could you say it again, perhaps a little more slowly?”
When people notice that you genuinely want to learn, many of them are happy to help. So gather your patience, not only for other people, but especially for yourself, and use each experience as information rather than as a reason to stop.
Practical Tips for Learning a Language Abroad
1. Capture new language
Carry a notebook and dictionary, physically or digitally.
Record words and sentences you hear.
Write down what you wanted to say but could not express.
Revisit previously learned vocabulary.
2. Practise producing language
Prepare common questions and sentences.
Use newly learned expressions on the same day.
Write short texts, poems or songs.
Speak aloud when you are alone.
Practise with a friend or language partner.
3. Train your ears and pronunciation
Write unfamiliar sounds phonetically in a way you understand.
Ask native speakers to repeat words slowly.
Listen to podcasts and music.
Study song lyrics and their pronunciation.
Watch children’s programmes with subtitles in the same language.
4. Create a learning environment
Follow a course that suits your time, budget and learning style.
Join local events, volunteering projects, choirs or neighbourhood activities.
Spend time in places where the language is naturally spoken.
Make friends with people who are willing to occasionally help you practise.
5. Use digital tools wisely
Create physical or digital flashcards.
Follow useful language-learning accounts.
Use apps and games to maintain momentum.
Find an online teacher or conversation partner.
This makes the article much easier to scan and prevents it from feeling like an endless list.
Will Dating a Native Speaker Teach You the Language?
Having a partner who speaks the language does not automatically mean you will learn it. If you already share another language, you will probably use whichever one allows you to communicate most easily.
That happened to me. I wanted to improve my Dutch, but we naturally continued speaking English. We occasionally taught each other words from our own languages, but it wasn’t the most effective way to learn.
A partner can help when you deliberately agree to create moments for practice—for example, one meal, walk or evening each week in the target language. Without that intention, the relationship itself is unlikely to become a language course.
Keep the Language Moving
You do not need to be a genius to learn another language. The brain and body gradually adapt to what surrounds them. Progress comes through repetition, exposure, mistakes and the willingness to try again.
Even after many years in the Netherlands, I still have my own grammar, forget expressions I once learned and continue discovering new ways to communicate. Learning does not suddenly finish when you receive a diploma. It remains a living process.
The perfect course, teacher or environment does not exist. Begin with what is available. Speak before you feel ready. Use the words you have today, and allow tomorrow’s vocabulary to grow from them.
If you are living in the Netherlands and would like personalised support with language confidence, communication and Dutch cultural situations, you are welcome to explore a private session with me.
